As the on-time viewer, you have the responsibility to:

• Wait 24 hours after the show airs before posting any TV show spoilers on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, etc.
  
  
• In the case that you cannot contain yourself, post a spoiler warning and/or precede your post with “Can’t believe what happened on Lost…” instead of “ZOMG EVERYONE ON THE ISLAND IS DEAD.” This gives your reader enough time to whiplash their head away from the screen before becoming 100% spoiled.

As the late-viewer you have the responsibility to:

• Go Facebook/Twitter/Tumblr-silent between the times in which your show is playing on live TV and the time you finally get around to watching it.
  
  
• Not whine if you’re behind an entire season or more, and then get spoiled via the internet (mid-conversation spoilers only deserve angry eyebrows). You especially have no right to be angry if you’re purposefully not watching it on live TV because you “prefer DVDs”

As the late-viewer you have the right to:

• Disown your friends and family if they ruin things for you, within reason.

In other news, I checked my Twitter feed one more time before sitting down to watch the season finale of Top Chef  (I autonomously refresh my Twitter feed every 15 minutes, I actually didn’t mean to). I did this after the show ended only 20 minutes ago.

And what’s the first update I see? “So-and-so won Top Chef??” WOW, THAT TWEET WAS SO VALUABLE. YOU SO NEEDED TO SEND THAT OUT TO THE WORLD.