Like planning an event such as a wedding or birthday party, or studying for an insane math final exam, you come out of it with a massive list of how you would’ve done things differently.

Attending Art Basel is no different. The parties you choose to attend, the liquor choices you make and the company you choose to surround yourself with – they all have significant consequence.

And with that, here is my guide on how to survive Art Basel:

1. Drink wisely.
   
   The sheer volume of open bars this week leaves much room for drinking mistakes. If mixing liquors doesn’t get you, the multiple nights in a row of drinking will surely melt your stomach lining.
   
   Stick to your guns – if Bombay Sapphire is sponsoring the first open bar you hit, refuse to drink anything other than gin for the rest of the night. One wrong move and it’ll quickly turn into an acid reflux party.
   
   Let you first shot of the night be Pepto Bismol and take a one-night break from drinking and you should be able to make it to Monday morning.
   
   
   
2. Try to get into that celebrity-ridden invite-only private party.
   
   
   The faces of people who snuck into a private LCD Soundsystem show
   
   In 2010, word got around that LCD Soundsystem (#3 on my Top Favorite Bands of All Time list) was playing a private party thrown by MOCA Los Angeles at The Raleigh on Miami Beach. Whether it be via dressing up as a shrub, or rappelling down the hotel’s walls I knew there was no way I wasn’t going to do everything in my power to get inside.
   
   Through smarts and a mostly a mess of good luck we were inside eating truffle paninis, shrimp skewers and being apologized to for being given wrinkled napkins. Life was good.
   
   We passed the good luck toward others and grabbed strangers’ hands to pull them inside as they climbed over the walls. This success was immediately followed by high fives and chants of “fuck the invite-only!”
   
   Lesson: If all else fails, scale the walls.
   
   
   
3. Street food is king.
   
   
   Jefe’s fish tacos are the shit.
   
   Miami is teeming with new and inventive restaurants, but let’s be honest, you aren’t likely to snag a reservation at the last minute during Art Basel week or else you’ll have to wait at least an hour to dine at places like Gigi and Sugarcane. On Saturday night, I waited well over 45 minutes in line at Midtown’s Sakaya Kitchen.
   
   This is when street food quickly becomes your best friend.  Gourmet food trucks like Ms Cheezius, Dim Ssam a Go Go and others are rampant in the area, allowing very little interruption to your gallery-hopping throughout the day. Better yet, treat your fatty self by grabbing a small dish from one of the trucks in order to eat something varied an hour later at a different truck.
   
   Find out whether you’ll cross paths with the trucks with Burger Beast’s daily truck locator: http://www.burgerbeast.com/2008/09/your-south-florida-street-food-guide.html
   
   
4. Treat your feet with love.
   
   
   
   It seems that girls in every other major city outside of Miami actually understand the point of flats. Most of us South Florida women can’t and won’t wean off our high heels, not even with the prospect of walking for miles during Basel… and the influx of tall European women to compete with won’t help our case.
   
   By Day Three of Basel, I was that girl walking down the street barefoot, both heels in hand caring very little about the diseased things I could potentially step on. Next time I’ll prep those heels with cushions and bring a spare set of flats in my bag.
   
   
   
5. Be a wristband collector and a student for life.
   
   
   This dude knows what’s up.
   
   Toward the end of the week, I found myself weary of the $15-$20 entrances at exhibitions, multiple nights of bar tabs after-hours and other miscellaneous and exorbitant spending.
   
   I ended up keeping all the wristbands I collected and found myself able to stroll right into other events. “Oh, this is a pink wristband event? I’ve got one of those riiiiiight… here!”  Ultimately, there’s so much going on and so many people, even a casual meander right through the entrance did the trick.
   
   If the wristband collecting doesn’t work, you can always save a couple of bucks by asking for a student discount – most places won’t ask for ID.
   
   
6. Hit the ATM.
   
   Everyone and their mothers are taking out money for the cash-only bars and exhibits. I ended up in an obnoxious situation where every ATM within a half-mile radius from the Scope art fair on Saturday afternoon was out of service/out of money. Hit the ATMs before you head out, make sure you have enough $1’s for tips and you’ll be set.
   
   
7. Start your art collection on training wheels.
   
   While it’s fun to admire and be inspired by art,  only a small percentage of us can easily afford to throw down a few thousand bucks on a piece we really like. Every year, I always make it a point to keep an eye out for prints. I’ve walked away with limited edition prints of really nice paintings for $45-$60. It’s nice to come back home and keep a piece of Basel for yourself without breaking the bank.

All right, Art Basel 2011. THIS time I really have you on lock…